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Sep 112011

One of the things I think we tend to do, that we’re encouraged to do, really, is to only pamper or treat ourselves well for others. Think about all the sensory experiences that go into getting ready for a date.

Prepping for a date usually includes some sensual delights even if we don’t see them that way: The envigoration of a quick hot shower, or the relaxation of a long scented bath. The feeling, on your hands and on your head, of brushing and styling your hair. Even the deliberation over clothing, trying to find what will help you look and feel your best, can be an enjoyable experience of colour, texture, and sensation. I think it’s fair to say that most people find these things exciting because of the anticipation (even nervous anticipation) of the date. Let’s find them exciting and enjoyable in their own right.

Whether we’re partnered or single, we deserve to enjoy these experiences whenever we like. Going even further, I think we can learn to enjoy taking ourselves on a date. This might mean going out or staying in for an evening to ourselves. What you do might depend on whether you live with people–that is, how easy it is to get time alone.

Here’s the thing though: Whatever your preparation ritual for a date with someone else would be, do it for yourself.If that means throwing on jeans and a t-shirt, then by all means. If that means taking time with your appearance and outfit selection, go for it! never been on a date with someone else? Imagine what you’d want it to be like, and make it happen for yourself.

Over the next few weeks, I’ll be sharing some ideas for what I like to call solo seduction.

Friendly readers: What are your pre-date rituals? Would you consider practicing those rituals simply for your own enjoyment?

Sep 102011

Join me this Wednesday (the 14th) at 9 PM EDt for a myth-busting introduction to butt sex. Learn how this sexual activity really works, and why people do it.

Here Are the details:

But….But….Butt Sex

Butt ssex is one of those practices that a lot of people do, many more think about, and that almost no one talks about in so-called polite society. Whether you are curious, have dabbled with anal sex, or are convinced that your butt is “exit only”, join me to learn what the butt buzz is all about. You may just find yourself surprised.

You Will learn:

  • Truths and myths about health and safety.
  • Tips for getting started with solo or partner butt play.
  • Resources for helpful toys and products.
  • To access this tele-class dial:

    conference code: 265077

    As always, you can Email Me with questions or comments.

    Looking forward to having you there!

Jul 122011

I say this all the time: Lube is really important. I think my friends get tired of hearing me say that. If they voiced their boredom, they might remind me that I call myself a toy maven, and that I should get back to talking about toys, pleasure anatomy, and all that good stuff.

Lube really is the anchor that can pull all that other juicy (pun intended) stuff together, though. It can make sex play easier, more fun, more pleasurable, and safer. It’s important whether you’re playing by yourself, or with others, with or without toys, and with or without safer sex barriers–such as condoms or gloves. Most people–talking mainly about female-bodied folks here–don’t produce enough of their own wetness to make things fun, comfortable, and long-lasting. Speaking of those safer sex barriers, dryness and friction can cause them to split, so using lube with barriers is essential to using them safely.

If you are one of those people who does produce a lot of lubrication and you find your sex play works just fine without it, by all means skip the lube, but please don’t skip it because you think you’re not supposed to need it.

There are dozens–perhaps even hundreds–of different lubricants on the market, and it can be tough to figure out which one you need.

IN this ttele-class I talk about different categories of lube and the pros and cons of each.

IN this class I talked about things to look for in your lube choices, as well as things to watch out for. What have you found in your own quest for the perfect lube? Do you have any shopping or usage tips for others?

Jul 032011

Join me for a tele-class on one of my favourite topics–lubricants!

Lubrication is important for safe, comfortable, and, most of all, pleasurable sex. Whether you’re partnered or alone, lubricant will smooth the way to a happier, healthier, and longer-lasting experience.

Somehow, most of us have ended up with the idea, especially regarding female bodies, that our own natural lubrication should be enough. The amount of natural lubrication the vagina secretes varies from person to person, and even from time to time. Keeping a bottle of lubricant on hand ensures that sexy time can happen any time, regardless of wetness.

Male-bodied folks usually learn early in their solo sexual explorations that keeping things slippery makes life a lot easier. This knowledge doesn’t always make it into partnered sex, though.

Want to learn more about lubrication, including why it’s so important and how to find the right lube for you?

Join me on Thursday July 7 at 9 PM (ESt) for a free 30 minute tele-class, and I’ll give you all the basics for celebrating slipperiness.

details Below:

Lube It Up: Pleasure In A Bottle

Thursday July 7 9:00-9:30 PM EST:

In this class you will learn:

  • why additional lubrication is important.
  • where to buy lubricants and how to choose which one is right for you.
  • the differences between silicone, water-based, and oil lubricants.

Open to people of all genders, sexual preferences, and relationship statuses.

To join, dial:

and enter the conference code: 265077

Have questions?

Shoot me an